“After the Cake” – Humble musings on marriage as an understanding, supportive, and loving partner…even when I just want to scream “REALLY?? More after the jump…
Paul Newman was married to Joanne Woodward for fifty years. If you’re going to take advice on marriage make sure it’s from someone who had a successful one.
I absolutely love this.
Hi Lena! I do too! xo
I couldn’t agree more. Marriage should never feel like a chore or something you ‘have to do’ or ‘have to put up with’.
I am in agreement with you totally! xx
Marriage doesn’t mean the end of romantic love It’s the beginning of a deeper more meaningful kind of love. The kind that reminds you every day why you said yes to forever. Image via b.loved.
OMG! I love this!! Great post! <3
Thank you! Don’t know where all my comments went. Lost them in my switch to Disqus!
[…] lesson from Naomi about being thankful for the acts of love from your […]
That is a wonderful “challenge” to find things you are grateful for about your partner! Could do the same for any member of your family, too.
“After the Cake” a real talk about marriage. Today’s question: does romance lessen after marriage or does it change? http://t.co/isHPgi9UzB
Such a beautiful tribute to love, gratefulness and that very wonderful man of yours.
Absolutely, totally, completely true! It is really our actions with each other than speak volumes. Thinking of the other person, finding little ways to make their life easier, more fun, more full – and it usually are the little things that actually mean more. I love when Jason does goofy/silly things to get that grin (the grin he says that he is the only one lucky enough to really see). I love when he takes a cab to the airport for those really early flights out, knowing he married a sleeper – and takes the decision from me, so I don’t have to feel guilty debating getting up that early. I love how he remembers to say our specific habitual good-luck things before I head off to a wedding (“rock their world”) or off to a meeting with a new couple (“book ’em danno”). I love how he now has a picture on his phone of himself sticking his tongue out at me, so he can text it to me when he’s traveling (rather than at the desk in our shared office) and make me laugh. I love how he has great suggestions for either my splurge/cheat meals when he knows I need or want to be off, or awesome on-plan meals when he knows I want to be on. I love how he takes my family on, even getting on the floor to play with our niece, despite not enjoying that time the way I do. I love how he expresses to me, and to others, how proud he is of the business I’ve built.
I could go on and on.
It’s not even worth mentioning the easy and obvious things, like you said, as those actually aren’t what touch us as much. These little things are the more intimate, the deeper ones, I think, because they require really knowing us.
Romance and marriage do they exist? If you say no, you are probably not looking hard enough http://t.co/isHPgi9UzB
So very true. So beautifully said… and I love how Lena’s parents (I see it in the comments) read this at their wedding…
Naomi, I think I’ve shared that my parents read this passage at their wedding–as a child, I couldn’t understand why they’d read something so “unromantic”, but as I’ve made my own commitment, I don’t think the value of space freely given and fully cherished can be overstated. Such a beautiful post.
Oh, I so absolutely agree! To me, it is about being a team, a partnership. Any successful team has shared goals, but each member of the team has different roles to play, based on their skills, talents, and interests. That doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy learning about the other’s role and interests, but we don’t need to totally take it on as our own.
In my marriage, I am a baseball gal, and he is a car guy. Early on, he started to go to baseball games with me, as he loved seeing the grin on my face at games, and began to learn about baseball (if he had to be there, might as well know more), especially as he learned that my heart went aflutter when he could make some knowledgeable comment about my Padres or the game. And I did the same thing with cars and car events for him – all because I love that grin on his face, and making his heart go aflutter with my interest in his passion. But really, I know he would never choose to go to a baseball game, just as I would never choose to spend all day at a hot or cold race track, but you do things like that for each other. And, you also don’t hesitate to let them go off and spend the day enjoying their passion without you, as you look forward to them coming home to you afterward and enjoying it all again in the re-telling!
We are a team, with shared goals and a joint destination, and we know we always have the other’s back. But we are not twins and don’t ever aim to be.
Read the new married life series “After the Cake”? Are you giving your partner space enough space to grow? http://t.co/lxgjrNmB
[…] out ITL’s new series on marriage “After the Cake” do you give your partner space? Tags: lifestyle blogs, lovely links 2 […]
These were my parents’ wedding vows, 34 years ago just this week. When I was younger I couldn’t make sense of it, but as I’ve grown up, I see so much goodness in space within your unity. Thank you for this beautiful post.
Ohhh friend, you are so gifted with your words and such a breath of refreshment. Your authenticity is contagious and I think you nailed one of the HARDEST aspects of marriage: sharing a common goal but providing each partner enough space to be themselves. Such a delicate balance! I love you!! xoxo
For my evening friends a new series -After the Cake for those married/partnered 1st post giving & getting space http://t.co/hQsydTIB
Loving this series! A wedding is only the start of the adventure….
After the Cake a new series on the married life. Are you allowing your partner to grow ?http://t.co/wvlcMAPO #marriedlife
I’m loving this new series on life after the wedding from @NaomiVGoodman! http://t.co/2FCQmgAU
I must admit, I’ve never read The Prophet but now I REALLY want to! I agree with you completely. I think a strong marriage is made of two strong individuals who come together to create a strong partnership of support. I’m excited for more from this series!
I couldn’t agree more!!! Great post!!!!!
My new series is called “After the Cake” is about marriage http://t.co/hQsydTIB The 1st post “Space in Your Togetherness”